A Boy Tries To Change His 9/11 Birthday At Malden Court

(Note: Sherri Murray is a Malden resident and .)

Ten years ago, as the world watched in horror at the events unfolding in Manhattan and Washington, I had the unusual challenge of putting on a happy face and hosting a birthday party. 

9/11 affected us all, but for my family, it was unique – September 11, 2001 just happened to be my son's ninth birthday. Many guests failed to show up at all, and the few who did just wanted to feel close to something happy.

After the party, I held my kids tight while we watched the news together. I answered their questions by mostly replying, “I just don't know why.” Within minutes, my son started to cry, and told me he felt ashamed to have his birthday on this day.

It was at that moment I declared that we are to celebrate life on 9/11. I held him close and shared the story of the first time I met him, along with some of the best memories he had given me over the years.

***

Weeks passed, and my son continued to answer well-wishers about the date of his recent birthday, who often gave a sympathetic “oh” or wincing “I am so sorry” at the news.

I was unaware of this until he came home one day and asked “Why do people feel sorry for me because of my birthday?” I assured him it was not because of “him,” it was just people feeling the effects of the 9/11 tragedy.

A year passed, and while planning my son’s tenth birthday party, he informed me he did not want a party or anything to do with this day. Instead, he proposed we change his birthdate to something more festive. When I explained to him that it could not be done, his face filled with anger - “why not?”

His point was well-taken - from his perspective, a person can change their name and change their appearance, so: why not a birth date?

After days of nagging, I finally took him to the courthouse. When I explained our intentions to the clerk, he replied with a chuckle and said “you've got to be kidding me.” 

As I started to walk out the door with my son next to me, I replied sternly, “No sir we are not kidding”. It was then he saw I had a child with me, and called me back to the window. He was suddenly kind and found us a few seats in another room.

***

Within minutes, the Clerk Magistrate of the Malden Court entered. He was not only compassionate, but also listened to my son’s request. He took time to validate his feelings and assured him it was okay to celebrate his birthday with cake, ice cream, and all of the fixings.

He went on to tell my son he thought it was unlikely he'd be able to legally change his birthday, but offered to research and send his findings.

He closed the meeting by giving my son a firm handshake and telling him not to let the terrorists take “his” day away, adding that his birth had brought so much joy to our family and will continue to bring joy to all who meet and love him.

Therefore, as we near the ten-year anniversary of 9/11, we are once again planning a celebration - a celebration of my son’s life - and yet, this celebration includes many thoughts to all who have lost loved ones on this day.